Like how I wrote the most controversial article about dating Mexican men in Spanish, it would’ve been extra cool if I have written this in Hebrew. However, this article is for all the women outside of Israel who has been writing to me endlessly: what’s dating an Israeli guy like?
Don’t look at me. I have not dated any Israeli formally but I know a bunch of guys whom I met from my trip in South America. Actually, they are everywhere. At 18, Israelis are required to serve the army (women for 2 years and men for 3 but it varies). The mandatory service freaks the hell out of their teenage rocking years because majority of them find it so hard to do it. Why do they go crazy? Put yourself in their shoes: if you are enforced to join the Army at a very young age, wouldn’t you be like, “why in the world would I do that and what the hell do I know about handling guns?” After the mental shenanigan in the barracks, by default, a big bulk of them travel. I am pretty sure you’ve stumbled upon one Israeli in your travels. THEY. ARE. EVERYWHERE.
Photo Source: Google search
But how much do you really know about these beautifully bronzed, blessed with sexy hair with a magnetic aura Israeli men? Okay, we know a lot of basic things like their mothers are always above any woman in the speed dial, their curse words sound like a spell from Harry Potter and that they are borderline obsessed with politics, among others. Through my 2-months traveling and living in Israel, I have come to the conclusion that women run this terrain of miserable but wonderful world of Israeli men.
A high five to the beautiful and strong women of Israel
The Israeli women did it. Strong, powerful, ambitious, career-driven, fun, beautiful, sexy as hell, leaning in together — I can seriously go on and on describing the women of Israel and everyone will agree with me. Achoti is a Hebrew term which means “my sister” and I have found an achoti in every Israeli women I met, young and old. When you do it right, they will be your extraordinary ally.
“Difficult” is a term coined for Israeli women because men tend to blurt these kinds of adjectives when they don’t get what they want. For many, it appeals as a negative form but for those who understand, difficult is good. You see, picking up an Israeli woman is the hardest task (and most expensive) in this country. Most guys get ignored here because of the lack of interest Israeli women parade every time they are offered drinks or forced by a guy to engage in a small talk. Sorry, they are just not interested. It will take a big blog of creativity to knock them off their feet. And oh yeah, yes, these badass women went to the army too. So don’t mess with them and don’t do something stupid. You’ll get yourself into trouble if you do.
It is pretty inspiring, these Israeli women. They know what they want and know when to get it. All they have to do is to ask nicely and the whole of Israel will combine their forces to make it happen.
Tel Aviv daily: the Mediterranean Sea plus all the hotstuff running around, playing frisbee, matkot and football — topless.
It’s cultural, I guess. I haven’t explored the women’s department in-depth but I know that one thing is true:
Everything is up to you.
Yes, you. Not just the Israeli women, but you. You girl, yes, wherever you are from, yes! It’s up to you.
Israeli men are the by-product of the strength that Israeli women have
My friends always wondered how possible it is for me to be out every night: drinking, socialising and painting Tel Aviv yellow without getting completely broke. “I always get things for free,” I would respond. Not as a blogger or a media person but as a woman. Try sitting down in one of the bars in Dizengoff by yourself. Oh no, you can bring your girl friends, too. Make sure you are not with guys because in split seconds, 5 different groups of Israeli men will come up to you, lay some drinks on the table and start the small talk. For foreigners like me and my European women squad in Tel Aviv, the opening line will be “so, where are you girls from?”
I can really say a big percentage of Israeli men are physically attractive (again, this is a default for me, I don’t know about you) somehow it will be hard to look away. However, wavelengths are not always the same. There should be something else behind all that gorgeousness. Something different. Something special.
I don’t really find it annoying when they just come up at the table and do these things. You know, the things that they do when picking up a girl. Most especially when I am getting free drinks! Come on, who says no to that! But the beauty of this is that, in Israel, the men are very polite and respectful. If you say “you’re not interested,” they will slowly leave you alone (still with the hopes of hooking up in their eyes) and let you be. This is so much different as oppose to some men from other countries who will curse at you, be aggressive and say “you are not pretty anyway.” There is no single cocky move from Israeli men even if most of them are entitled to it.
Photo Source: Google search
I am not Jewish (but I want to convert just so I can live in Israel longer) but I am very much aware about the religious practices of the jews. Yom Kippur is a Hebrew holiday which you are to repent and say sorry for the meanest things you’ve ever done in your life. So, 2 weeks ago, me and my girl friends prayed: “I am sorry to all the Israeli guys who gave me free drinks but didn’t get something in return.”
As I said, it’s up to you.
Dating/seeing/hooking-up with an Israeli guy is above and beyond your wildest powers as a woman. “It’s up to you” is a big responsibility because you are in control of every situation. When things get awkward, challenging and out of control, there is no one to blame but you.
Let’s give a more concrete example to that: The ratio of my friendship with every human being in the world is 50% gay, 35% men and 15% women. Yes, I have more guy and gay friends because I tend to carefully choose the women in my circle. In Israel, I was caught up in so much situations where I had to sleepover a guy friend’s house for reasons such as late night hang outs or too disoriented to function kind of thing. Just to clarify: Israeli men are very caring even if you are not romantically involved. The level of care they show their girlfriends extends to sisters, girl friends, mothers, daughters and even strange foreign girls who can’t seem to navigate their way in Allenby. They are naturally thoughtful (helpful) and you don’t need to be in a relationship with one in order to experience that affection. But bear in mind that most Israeli guys are really looking for somebody to love. I think it’s a social must to be in a relationship or get married in Israel, just because.
Going back to the sleepover story, a good friend of mine whom I met in Peru said: “This is so weird that you are sleeping over and we are not doing anything.”
“What do you mean?”
“In Israel, when I am to spend a night with a girl, something sexual always happens. It is what it is. Majority of the population of Israel are Millennials (ages 18-35) and sex is just a way of life here.”
Photo Source: Google search
I am not from Israel and I will never ever engage myself in a very irresponsible act most especially when it means putting a dot to a very good friendship. For me, having sex with a good friend (Israeli or not) will just make things awkward and install some discomfort in the friendship dome. Sex definitely changes everything. It does not mean the same for Israelis but still, again and again, I value my friendships and I would I would only do this if I am attracted or romantically involved with someone.
But that is me. If you find yourself in this situation with an Israeli dude, remember:
It’s up to you.
If you say no, they will definitely stop bugging you. If you show some signs of interest and hot boxed controlled affection, they will never say no to that. Know that in this situation, you will be the one who will jump on them. Not the other way around because you know, they are very polite. Your jumping act will be fiercely, wildly and passionately reciprocated, I tell you that.
And if you decide not to screw things up and just leave them blue, the following day will not change anything. I was on the beach today with my European women squad and the “juice” topic came about.
Squad Girl #1: “Yeah, I didn’t have sex with him but when I woke up, there was water on the table together with a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice.”
Squad Girl #2: “Yes, OMG! I got pomegranate with orange!”
Squad Girl #3: “I got beetroot.”
Squad Girl #4: “Wait wait wait. Why didn’t I get any of these when I was the one who had sex?”
Me: “Not even water? Achoti, you are not in the right Israeli men crowd. Tonight, I will arrange you to go out with one of my guy friends and tomorrow, you will text me what juice you got, okay? Just for the sake of the experience. I mean the juice is a plus but there should be water, at least.”
“Squad Girl #3: “Agreed. But for me, still, the water is already too much. I mean, come on, dude, are we dating or what? It’s like a relationship I didn’t agree to. Come on, you don’t have to bring me water! I can do it myself but yeah, it’s just there. All the time. It never fails.”
Squad Girl #1: “It’s freakishly freaky how they treat you like girlfriends but in reality, it’s just an Israeli trait — to be polite. And I love it!”
Carmel Market hits with the squad.
The water thing is too much because you know, when you are hooking up, you are suppose to just come and go. You should be the girl who leaves the next morning but receiving this Ivy League hospitality changes the game. It leads many foreign women to get head over heels with an Israeli guy because they don’t make it difficult. They are loveable by nature and it’s so hard to beat.
“Just say it and they will do everything for you” is another observation I truly believed that everything is really up to me. From calling the bank, to installing the wifi, to storing my stuff while I am away, to getting my bike repaired, I’ve had my Israeli guy friends in Tel Aviv running errands for me and I didn’t even ask. As a new resident here, I am entitled to an unlimited cards of questions that have been useful in many situations.
“Hey, my bike is broken and I need it repaired. Would you know a place where I can bring it?”
“I am going to Dizengoff in a few. There is a bike shop near Pinsker. Shall I pass by your flat and bring your bike? I can do it, don’t worry, it’s on the way.”
It has been always “on the way” for some reasons. They would make you feel it’s not a hassle or you are not bothering. It was so much different from the machismo I experienced in Latin America where men have their balls over their head and just wouldn’t bother to do things for you because you are supposed to do things for them. I love that the Israelis do not feel emasculated when doing something for girls. They carry their masculinity with pride and at the right place. They don’t act like lap dogs. They don’t look like lap dogs! They always manage to make buying tampons for their girlfriends to look like an effortless draw of sexy. The Israeli men are born to make the modern feminist happy. You can even ask them to jump 20 times and run the whole Tel Aviv beach. They’ll do it for you. To abuse that card or not?
It’s up to you.
Photo Source: Google search
Hooking up or not, the Israeli men are listeners. They are men who you’d want to have long conversations with because they know how to listen. They know when to talk. Even if they are very annoyed or not in the same wavelength, they will just there, looking at you with so much love in their eyes and listen. It is very challenging to encounter men who listen but in Israel, there are plenty. You will never run out.
As many foreign women admitted, they are the best men to date but my sharing capacity has been reached. Every day, I am hanging out with different people from different walks of life but the most accurate has always been the Israeli men. I am definitely against stereotyping and I’d like to state a disclaimer here: each individual have unique lives and what I wrote here doesn’t apply to every men in Israel. The girls whom I shared the same love and passion for Israel as a country would agree but I am in no way expecting you to do the same. As always, I am telling a story based on real-life situations. If you are a woman curious about Israeli men, should you come to Israel and see it for yourself?
It’s up to you.
Disclaimer: This article is not meant to inform nor educate. All texts are based from a true story.
Have you dated an Israeli bloke? I would love to hear your stories! Share it on the comment box below!